DON’T say it! 8 ‘words’ that can kill a man’s self-esteem

The following list is comprised of a few particular words and phrases that are guaranteed to wound a guy no matter how he may react outwardly. So here we go…

1. "I'll just talk to someone who understands me." – So you're saying that I'm such an awful partner that I've spent all this time with you without paying attention to your particular emotional needs? Wow. That hurts.

2. "You never…." – This is a particularly hurtful statement. Why? Because by saying, "you never…", you've essentially made it clear that something he most likely has done at least periodically, was a waste of time and effort because you didn't notice it anyway. And you can't save the situation by saying, "Well, you know what I mean." Nope. We don't know what you mean. We don't read minds. We know what you've said, though.

4. "I just can't talk to you." – This stings. All we ever want to do is make you happy. It may not always seem like it, but generally that's where most guys' heart lies. Say that and the guy immediately thinks, "You can't talk to me? All I do is try to talk to you and hear whats on your mind…but when I ask you 'what's wrong?' You say, 'nothing.' I can't win."

5. "_______ used to do _________ for me/with me!" – Ouch. If ________was so great, why the hell didn't you stay with him?

6. "I don't like "big ones" because they hurt…yours is perfect, honey.". And yes, it's shallow and a little petty, but let's be real…most of guys act confident about their junk, but statements like that can ruin a guy's self-esteem instantly.

7. "Size doesn't matter." – Just stop it. By having to say, "it doesn't matter" you're saying how much it totally matters. And we're crushed. For more, see #6.

8. "You're boring." – Come on. Seriously? I mean even if that's kind of true, there's got to be a better way to relay the message that you'd like to go out more often. Being told you're boring is a stab right in the heart…NO guy wants his partner to think he's bland. That comment is also a kick to a guys' confidence. Now he's worried that his lady is seeking excitement somewhere other than him.

There are more, but the greater point here is that you may want to think twice before blurting out something in anger or out of blatant insensitivity. Guys may not always share the hurt, but they feel it – and far too often that point is forgotten simply because a man is…..a man.
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